Five Solutions to Common Relationship Problems | LoveToKnow
If you are experiencing any of these common relationship problems, don't panic: there is a solution to them. The 4 Most Common Relationship Problems — And How To Fix Them. Relationship So where are the real answers? I decided to call an. Any seasoned marriage counselor will tell you that even the happiest couples have problems. In fact, Dr. John Gottman, storied marriage.
What kind of story do you tell?
When your partner describes your relationship to others, what kind of story do they tell? Does the story minimize the negatives and celebrate the positives? Did it make the other person sound great? They really emphasize what was missing. They nurture gratitude instead of resentment.
For more on what research says makes love last, click here. Negativity feeds on itself and makes the conversation stay negative. The New Science of Love: Now you should stop talking. When their partners have a problem, they drop everything and listen non-defensively with empathy.
You can edit these videotapes together and it looked like the same conversation over and over for 22 years.
The 4 Most Common Relationship Problems -- And How To Fix Them - Barking Up The Wrong Tree
Masters learn to accept what will not change and focus on the positive. Criticism, Defensiveness, Contempt and Stonewalling. The 3 things that prevent them: Keep a cool head and resist emotional inertia. One last thing that really blew me away: Changing priorities can cause a lot of conflict.
Look for what you both still have in common, while allowing your partner to change and grow. Embrace who they are now instead of pining for the past. If you have different priorities about major lifestyle issues, look for common ground and compromises that you are both happy with. Chore wars are a leading cause of conflict in relationships. Agree together on who is responsible for what, and stick to it. Factor in a little flexibility for when one of you is much busier than usual.
If you both have different ideas of what constitutes a neat home, it might be time for a little compromise.
10 Common Relationship Problems and How to Solve Them
Different intimacy needs Problems with your sex life are stressful and can have a big impact on your relationship. Carve out time for intimacy. Arrange for someone else to take the kids once a week, or make the most of any time you have alone at home together.
Sex keeps you feeling physically and emotionally close, so make sure you are both happy with your sex life. These common problems plague most relationships from time to time. Appreciation Exercises For couples to put money in their relationship bank, appreciation exercises can help each of you feel better about the other. Acknowledge what they do for you and how it makes you feel," Barth says. Active listening and appreciate exercises eliminates the assumption that your partner doesn't hear or appreciate you.
Solving your relationship problems means working together every day to maintain your relationship. Make Solutions the Rule Couples become distracted because they are busy with work and kids. These couples get used to ignoring each other and forget to treat the other as "special" like they used to. Barth emphasized that a weekly, or at minimum, bi-monthly date night makes a world of difference.
Identify Your Triggers In addition to all of the above, it's important for couples to identify what triggers them in a conversation to turn it into an argument. When I feel this urgency that he must understand me right now and I feel the sense of being trapped, I know no good will come.
I breathe and I tell him that I'm going in the other room to calm down, and collect my thoughts.
He'll happily change the subject. That comes from really knowing yourself. Remind yourself it's not about being right. It's about listening to each other and respecting your partner and yourself. Two exercises Barth recommends for couples to start practicing whether they have relationship issues right now or not, are active listening and appreciation exercises.
Choose Resolutions That Work For You Every couple is different, but one common thread in all successful relationships is the ability of the couple to resolve their disagreements. Not every solution will work for every couple, but practicing active listening and appreciation exercises can help couples achieve the right solution for their issues.